Don't Piss Off The Faerie

The days of hiding my words deep inside are past, I will not deny my truth to make anyone else feel comfortable. I refuse to conceal the foundation of who I am to ease anyone else's discomfort and inability to handle the messier aspects of life and relationships. I will not budge from what I know to be true for me. To do otherwise would be the greatest crime of all, a lie so magnificent it erases all that you are. No, not for love, not for shame, not for fear, pride or envy will I sacrifice this truth inside me. I refuse to deny countless hours of painstaking labor, agony and pure force of will, born from a desire to be more than what I was. I will gaze at the raw edifice of my soul and revel in its primal beauty, bask in its light with awe and wonder. This is not a structure of grace and dignity rather a testament to grit, determination, the absolute refusal to lay down and die. I will stand before this monument of self, honor the price that was paid to build her and solemnly v...

I forgot who I was for a hot minute,  I looked away from my truth for a second, lost my light and fell right off the track and into the land of No-No. Wow! You would think that I would have remembered what happens when I deviate from my inner path, man, bad stuff always follows, clearly I did not listen and I fell off track but I'm back baby!! HAH! Take that universe!! I found myself again in the midst of the pain, fear and chaos and I looked inside. I quit looking all around me, turned back inwards in desperation, completely at a loss to understand why I was feeling so wretched and torn up and BAM! I found reality again. It always comes back to self, every single time I fall apart the reason is, without fail, a disconnect from self. It's all on me, it's my job to make sure I am connected to my center, that I am plugged into my core, listening with all my senses and staying true to who I am. Now, that's not to say that some external forces aren't trying t...

For all my resourcefulness and my clever ways, I still can't fight the consequences of actions set in motion long past. I have tried so hard to make up for my mistakes, to spare the ones I love the most from the affects of my stupidity, my failure haunts me.  I'm wracking my brain for a way out, watching you suffer with my hands tied behind my back. I have tried to learn, to grow from where I was before, to be better and it seems it doesn't matter. If it was just me suffering, I could handle that, yours rips me in two. I'm sorry, for the pain I see on your face, for the ache in your soul. I'm sorry you've had to face your demons alone, you've had to struggle to survive to find your way in a world that doesn't understand what a beautiful gift you are. I wish I could show you the way my eyes see you, the brilliance of your mind the gentleness of your heart and the depth of your soul. You are special, there is no one like you and I don't understand h...